Home again home again, lickety split

Of course the trip home was eventful. Salt Lake City is lovely, especially from the airport. Seriously, can we get some mass transit out there people? On the flight home we had the flight attendant who thought he was a comedian "Welcome to Delta Flight 9886 to Bermuda.....Please turn off your Blackberries, Blueberries, Strawberries, Bananas and Pineapples...." I did however appreciate his coming on later to say "If that is your child running up and down the aisles please seat him before someone in the back of the plane trips him because he is currently preventing us from continuing beverage service to the rest of the plane."
So we taxi to the runway area and sit. And sit. Finally Funny Man comes on and says "The tower has pushed us back about an hour and half...." at which point a yell went up in the plane. "Now hold on people, I HEARD the pilot say "Do you understand this is a plane full of New Yorkers? That's unacceptable." It looks like its going to be about twenty minutes." So not too bad. We land and start just driving around. Funny Guy comes back on with "So....now we're looking for a parking space..."

Rapid to Salt Lake Cities

I just looked around the Rapid City Regional airport and I am one of 3, yes, three people in airport gate area. They even closed the little snack shop because there is no one here. Security? Ha! I took the laptop out of the bag and they told me that wasn't even necessary. Thank God they didn't weigh my suitcase when I checked it, I am quite sure it was over the weight limit. I mean, I am taking home rocks. Literally. Some of you will get them for presents.
At least they have free wifi, and it really is wifi! So I'm trying to figure out if there is anything I can during my layover in Salt Lake City. I suppose it would be nice to visit Temple Square, if for no other reason than because it is so huge. They claim they get more tourists than Yosemite. That makes me not want to go, that is just so sad. Well, I'll let you know.

Sheep

I've had a question regarding the docility of sheep. Which, now that I type it, is very funny.

Anyway, the Big Horned Sheep who was about to attack my car was my only run-in with sheep, so I'm entirely sure. He/She? certainly did not seem the least bit put off by me, my car, or the other people standing around the lookout spot not far down the road. He was tagged, as I think they monitor the population closely. The rangers said they usually hang out in rocky areas that are a bit too steep for humans to traverse. So there you have it. Your daily sheep info.

Last day

So I went to the Crazy Horse memorial today. Very impressive. All of Mount Rushmore could fit in Crazy Horse's head. Its rather large. People kept asking on the bus tour I took, why it is taking them so long to complete; the answer is twofold. First it is massive, much more so than Mount Rushmore which took a long time. Second, and this the more I thought about it the more I appreciated it, the entire thing is publicly funded. Korczak Ziolkowski refused to accept any government money, and one of his daughters spoke about a letter he wrote them (he has 10 children, 7 of whom are currently involved with the memorial) saying- don't take this up unless you plan on continuing with it, and doing it right. It makes sense; Gutzon Borglum died before Mount Rushmore was finished, the government took over and chopped his design in half (the Presidents are supposed to be carved to the waist). The government never honored a single treaty it made with any Native American tribe. If the government feels the memorial is important perhaps it could do more to encourage tourism to it, have presidents visit it (rather than send congratulatory letters like the ones displayed) and make everyone in the presidential entourage pay their own way. Wouldn't that be nice to see?

After Crazy Horse I spent some time in the Black Hills National Forest. I saw many of those quick marmots, getting some odd pictures of marmot tush. It was nice to just walk around and soak in it. Soak in what? Hard to explain, easy to feel, at least to me it was. Come and visit, you'll see what I mean. I decided to leave the backpack in the car and just carried my water- so sorry, no pictures (I don't have a case for the camera which makes it a pain to hike with as it has a huge display I don't want to scratch.) I am sick of that backpack anyway, its huge!
So I hike to the top of Harney Peak and regretted not having the camera. Harney is the highest mountain east of the rockies in North America and yet it was a pretty easy hike. Black Elk Wilderness is so peaceful, even for a busy weekend, it was still pretty easy to feel alone.

I'll be glad to get home to my own bed and pillow (I am a pillow snob and not afraid to admit it). It'll be nice to have conversations with people who know my name, but then again it won't be, you know?

Tomorrow is travel all day but I am going to try my hardest to leave the airport in Utah, as it is another state I have never been to.

I'm just now reading a friend (and relative!)'s travel blog and I'm so disappointed in myself. Mine could be so much better! Go easy on me, its my first run, I promise my next trip will awe and delight (most likely Cape Cod...who knows where else?). So today I am taking it easy, being my last day and all. I am staying at a place called The Big Sky Lodge. It was much cheaper than things in downtown Rapid City, its a Mom & Pop place, I get an AAA discount, etc. I have to say, I also picked it because of the cranky reviews on hotels.com. I love them! Clearly someone who was pissed that he didn't book early enough to get a chain hotel stayed here and was mad that it wasn't a Best Western/Radisson/whatever. Yes, the bed is old and creaky, but that has got to be my only complaint. I would've complained that they didn't give me any handsoap in the bathroom and I had to ask for some this morning, but well; turns out it was tucked into some lovely towel origami and I just missed it until today! So now I've already asked for extra soap and gotten some odd (but still friendly) looks. I think they think I'm a compulsive handwasher.

Regardless, it is the cutest place! It is on a service road overlooking Rapid City, the state's 2nd largest city (pop. 59,000, only about 10,000 more than Stratford). At night you can see the city lit up, but there's little light pollution out here and the night sky view over the Black Hills is pretty great. The cranky reviewer also commented on their lack of a "real" hot-tub. Actually, that is what it is- a hot-tub like you'd have in your backyard, in, well, their backyard. I was too tired to take advantage yesterday, but I hope to tonight. The owners suggested the CH restaurant for dinner, not sure what the initials stood for. It was very nice, homey, and bustling. They had local beer! I love it when my hotel recommends a place that serves local beer! (I had Leinenkugel Sunset Wheat in Wisconsin, so good!) Unfortunately, as is the case everywhere, the menu was meat, meat and meat-fried meat. I ended up with a shrimp pasta dish, again. It did however have actual vegetables in it, so I was a happy camper. I had to message Ben from my dinner table because I was so amused by this:
"Light" Menu (oh believe me, they're my quotation marks)
Fried Walleye, Fried Shrimp, Fried Chicken, a Half lb of ground buffalo, and Fried Clam Strips. There was a "light" children's offering too: Mac and Cheese.
I thought Ben's response was brilliant, "What's on the rest of the menu? Lard?"

Grr, arg.

Talk about growing pains. I just realized what the blog looks like. Turns out all my painstaking labeling of pictures just makes things look ridiculous. What am I to do? I need an editor! (an HTML editor, Mom, so unless you start reading up, forget it) Sorry about that folks, but at least everything below this post is still at squirrelfight.tumblr.com so you can see it the right way. Just be forewarned it says the exact same things, nothing new.

I stopped the audio tour to listen a ranger talk at Borglum's studio, it was neat because he pointed out how some things are only visible at certain times. For example here you can see Lincoln's hand holding his lapel; that's only visible from about 3-4:30 in the summer because of where the sun is.






Some Thomas Jefferson on Mount Rushmore facts: He was supposed to be on the other side of Washington but there wasn't enough carve-able stone so they got partway done and then blasted his face off, putting him where he is now. He looks kind of up, while everyone else is straight on because he used to be straight on and then they realized a large crack would make his nose fall off. So the sculptors moved him back a bit and angled him up. You can still see the crack but its been filled with caulk and doesn't threaten any features.

Once again, a post about the day before. I wrote this last night, in the hopes that the picture would ever upload. Right. Here it is:

Well, I’m going to type today’s post while I attempt to load one or two pictures from yesterday.
After watching sunset, I figured why not sunrise? Plus, based on where the sun was when it set, I just knew sunrise at Windows and Doors would be awful. As in full of awe. Get a dictionary, people.
So 4am it was, and as I slowly drove the Badlands Loop Highway during first light I was basically attacked by wildlife. Let’s see….first there was the herd of large deer-like animals with really big antlers. But antlery antlers, not prongy antlers, so not the Insert-Adjective-Here Pronged Elk. So I stop to take pictures of these guys, three adults and a baby, as they slowly pick their way over a big hill. I continue on, only to stop to photograph a deer on top of a jagged rock. It was so neat, all shadows. Then there was another deer-ish be-antlered animal walking near the Yellow Mounds. The Yellow Mounds are these rounded rock formations that have big striations that are brightly colored, yellow, red, and of course the dessert orange that dominates elsewhere. I hope I can post some of these pictures, the light was so faint they look like paintings. I continued on to my destination and I was not mistaken; the way the rising sun played on the rocks there made great shadows that only added to the already infinitely variable panorama. I hiked out again, took some great pictures of my own shadow, and was lying down enjoying the light show until a family of about eight million showed up and children began running towards me. Oh well, the sun was pretty far up, time to go.
On my drive back out, I discovered two prairie dog towns. The one I stopped at to take pictures was huge. There were signs warning people about the Prairie Dog Plague, apparently only your pet can catch it, so no use setting the children loose. As I was taking pictures I noticed that there were two large clumps of P-Dogs facing each other across a meadow. All of a sudden one group would get up on their haunches and start shrieking and banging the ground. It was so cool, of course when I started videoing they wouldn’t cooperate. I think I did get some P-Dogs smooching but no other Wild American lovin.
As the safari continued I got a great view of a Mambo Pronged Elk (why can’t I remember what the adjective really is?) just sitting and chillin. So I snapped away until the caravan of screaming children showed up and then I bolted.
I’m pulling away from the last lookout I stopped at when I see a Big Horned Sheep strolling towards me down the road. Right there, other side of the road. I quickly stop the car (there are not many of us on the road this early), roll down my window and pick up the camera. I have one (really great) picture of the sheep. Why only one? Because he immediately picked up speed and headed straight for me. I threw the camera on the floor, the car into gear, my hand on the horn and moved slowly, but determinedly out of his way. I’m not sure how I’d explain a round, horn-shaped dent in the side of the rental.
Four hours later, time for breakfast as the less-exciting mammals wake up. I packed up and hit the road for Rapid City.
So, Mount Rushmore. Sorry guys and gals, but this one holds up to my “they’re never as big in person” mantra. And the truth may be that the sculpture is THAT big, but you never get close enough to find out. So I shell out for the audio tour, which is offered in English, Spanish, German or Lakota. After hearing it in English though, I have to wonder about that Lakota. At every stop there were optional aural vignettes, usually about how the Lakota feel/view what is/has gone on in the area. Mostly it was, “this area was our most sacred and they desecrated it”, “we worship the spirit in the rock and they blew it up with dynamite”, or “Lakota were invited to speak at the unveiling but cut off because NBC producers thought it was running too long.” Riiiight. So I’m thinking the Lakota translation goes something like this: “Welcome to our spiritual land. Isn’t it pathetic that its overrun with fat white tourists? I’ll even bet that there’s a guy you went to high school with dressed in over the top fake “native” wear having his picture taken with some obnoxious guy’s whiny daughter. Did he ask your buddy to do a rain dance? Greeeaat.” I’m just saying, if I did the translation, more people would want to learn Lakota.
So, at Mt. Rushmore you’re beat over the head with why Gutzon Borglum (the sculptor) chose each president. Washington because he helped to “birth” the country. Their words, not mine. Which is fantastic, can you just see George at Yale NHH? “One long breath and two short ones, here we go, hoo hee hee, hooo hee hee, you’re almost there! Just be glad you’re not next door giving birth to China!” Lincoln for “preserving” the union during the Civil War. Roosevelt because, well, we probably wouldn’t have a park to put the monument in without him. And Jefferson? Of all the wonderful and brilliant things Jefferson wrote and did why choose him? Well, for “expansion”. That’s right, Jefferson is up there mainly for the Louisiana Purchase. How’s that for a slap in the face to the Native Americans whose holy land we blew up, after stealing, and then carved I heart USA into? Jefferson represents expansion, which means the taking of land that did not belong to us, and the breaking of every single treaty ever signed with a tribe. Go America!
Although the way I look at it, I can recognize that they were all great presidents, and I can stamp my own personal reasons on there.
Alright, I just killed a cricket the size my thumb and even though I’m now terrified of what will be crawling on me in my sleep, I am going to bed.

Okay, I set this to upload OVERNIGHT and it still didn't work. So I'm caffeining up and taking advantage at a cute place call Java Junkie, but this is all you're getting for this day. This picture is just a good example of where we could hike. That's the royal we, of course.











Okay, see the flat outcropping to the center-left? That's where I sat and ate lunch. See why I'm not coming home now?

Always a day late: now in one piece!!

As per usual, we'll start with yesterday. I'm not sure how many pictures I'll be able to put up, as I'm now in Rapid City and their version of "high speed" internet is well, not very rapid. Let's just say I've read two short stories ("Brokeback Mountain" and "Banvard's Folly") while waiting for this page to load.

So yesterday I spent the day at The Badlands. I started with a ranger guided tour at the Doors and Windows lookout. The Badlands has a long highway that loops through it, and along the way there are many different kind of lookouts. Doors and Windows was by far my favorite (and yes, I did visit them ALL). After Ranger Rick, I followed the hike that extends out from the boardwalk here. There are these little metal stakes in the ground, some have numbers, and you follow them, like blazes back home. The ending spot was ridiculous. A cliffside view of round and jagged rock formations. I came back here for lunch, and sunrise this morning.

I also heard the ranger talk on fossils; The Badlands likes to think palentology started there, though my mother says it started in France. There is an abundance of fossils in the park, many signs asking you to let a ranger know if you see anything. They have an ongoing dig site, The Big Pig Dig, that I visited as well and spoke with the college students working there for the summer.

What can I say? I spent the entire day hiking and making little videos. I'm going to try to post them here, be forewarned I don't think I was able to control the giddy swearing.

Dinner was either the same restaurant as the night before or fast food, so Subway it was. Then back to the park for sunset. I saw a neat bird with a long, curved bill and a gold patch on its stomach. And of course a beautiful sunset. That's all for now folks, I'll try and put pictures up, then I'm having dinner and I'll work on today. Oh boy, today.

Somehow this one got lost. So here it is. This is a picture of: 1.My first view of The Badlands. 2. My car sunburn.

Hitchin post outside of Wall Drug.


























I made a teensy little purchase at Wall Drug.





















This is a picture of: 1. My first view of The Badlands. 2. My car sunburn.











I took this picture, then fell into his house and busted up my shin. Classic.


















These babies are massive.




















I-90 over the Missouri River.















The half-done Corn Palace.









The Big Mississippi. There's a rest stop with a lovely park on the MN/WI border. Its kind of ridiculously stunning.












The Spam Museum in all its glory.

Yesterday

Okay, let's try this again. The quick version, or as quick as I get.

Turns out its a longer drive from the happening burg of Fairmont, Minnesota (seriously, look it up) to Interior, South Dakota than I thought. I got a late start and headed out to Mitchell, SD home of the Corn Palace. That's right, Corn Palace. As in a Palace made of Corn. I told this to Mia, my six year old friend, and she asked why they didn't just make the building out of wood. Turns out they did, the first time around and it burned to the ground. Did they have popcorn?

Anyway, they were in the process of changing the murals on the sides of the Corny Palace. Inside they have permanent corn murals showing white men stealing land from the Lakota, a Bison peeing on the ground (apparently thats how corn started here), and a Lakota meeting a white man for coffee. Oh, how I wish I was joking.

Turns out Mitchell is a cute little town. So I hung around and shopped in the giant antique mall. Bad move. All of South Dakota has one highway. One highway that they are currently repairing all of. It was a slow, slow drive to Interior. On the few parts where traffic was actually on opposite sides of the road I kept pace with an SUV full of kids doing, well, let's just say, FAST. That was fun. Lots of fun. We both stopped for gas, and I talked to the woman driving the car, she made me say hi to her husband, who didn't believe a young woman by herself was driving that fast. Ha!

Well it was a good thing I did because I get to Interior and pull over to find lodging for the night, as I have each night. And, for the first time, a problem. I call the Cedar Pass Lodge, which is located inside The Badlands, full. Their partner, The Badlands Inn, full. So they send me to the Circle 10. Fine, except that it is an RV park. Too bad I'm not driving an RV. Oh wait, they have a building; its a Teepee. Now I might've slept in a Teepee but I didn't even have sleeping bag!

So I sucked it up and drove the rest of the way to Wall, SD. So now you'll get pics from this day and the day before.

Grr....spent the time, installed the software. Will update later. Here's a preview from yesterday. (Dunno why he's sideways now.)

"To play it safe is not to play."
- Robert Altman

I'll leave you with this beauty from Alaska. This is me and my new best friend, the Mendenhall Glacier.

Day Two

Camera Broke. Boo.

Had to buy a new one, spend much dinero.

Writing choppy just to piss off mom. Is it working?

So everything I saw before the MALL (ouch, not a road trip highlight) did not get photo-documented, que sera.

So I just went to look at what pictures I was going to upload so I could write about those and guess what? This is now the world's shortest blog. Sorry darlings, no more pictures. Apparently I can't upload the pictures from the new camera without reading the manual and installing a bunch of software. It is already past 11pm and I start out with a two hour drive tomorrow morning. I woke up late enough for cold eggs this morning, I'd like to not repeat that, so I have to go to bed (not to mention, I'm freakin tired!). I'm really mad, the old camera the pictures just magically appeared on the desktop, I hate when new technology is complicated and doesn't conform to my wishes. Maybe the camera elves will come in the night and fix things. If not, I apologize that you will never know the beauty that is the Spam Museum.

Nighty night.

Singing feet at Ella' Animatronic Deli. Appetizing, huh?

Doesn't it look just like me?

Grave at Showmen's Rest.

Midwest Road Trip Summer 2008: Day Uno

I started off just how I wanted, slow and steady. I wandered around Forest Park, IL's Woodlawn Cemetary to see Showmen's Rest, the memorial for dead circus folk. It includes the usual graves, but also headstones with things like "Goldie" and "Baldy", and giant stone elephants guarding the perimeter. Among the circus folk? Harry Potter. Shame he's dead too. The one's I found most interesting though, were a little more random, such as "Horsedriver" or "Unknown Male No.23". Not sure why that sounds so very poetic, but it does. So I said a poem for Unknown Male No.23 and left a stone on his grave.

Other stops today included The Cheese Chalet (purchased some Beer Kaese Aged Brick, Chicken Soup Cheese, Elk Sausage, and 10 year old Parmesan) where they keep the Limburgher in a separate case because it stinks so bad! Also, a gas station with a giant pink elephant wearing glasses. Sometimes I think I'm a giant pink elephant wearing glasses.

Dinner was at Ella's Anamatronic Deli which will give you ADD if you do not already have it. I do, so I was in no danger. Spiderman and Batman flew over my head while three different carousels (one of them human sized!) spun around. Every table was glass topped with a different themed game or toys underneath. My table had those iron shavings that you could move around with a magnet. I put fireworks behind a house and a lovely fur evening gown and dreadlocks on a man. I may have also given him a unibrow. But if I did, he deserved it.

Dinner was an app. of kugel (supposedly the very traditional kind of just sweet cream, cinnamon and noodles) and blintzes with homemade applesauce. My waitress asked if I wanted any of their famous frozen custard for dessert but I thought my lactose-intolerant stomach might explode.

I then swam back to the hotel. (See: weather reports for Madison, Wisconsin) I thought driving in the summer was going to be easy? Well, that's why I have so much built-in time, I don't have to cover any distance at night if I don't want to. I must rest chickadees, tomorrow's going to be a big day!